My Dear Darling (4)

Read the previous letters here:

My Dear Darling series 

Day 6
My Dear Darling,

     There has been a change in our plan. Things are not going well and we have been forced to return to out post. The only solace I find in this is that I can write you sooner than I expected to. You might wonder why I am telling you details of our actions.  Do not worry, my dear. It is safe for me to write such vague informs that everyone already knows. 

     On our way back, we had to hunt some game for food. I killed a lovely deer.  We could not use our guns for a fear of being heard. So shooting it down was not an option. The amount of stealth and speed it required was tremendous. It was almost like a training exercise. It was grazing so peacefully, quite a sight to look at. I sneaked upon it from behind. I stabbed through it’s neck even before I landed from my leap. The thrill ran high in my blood, until I saw it’s thick red blood gushing from the deep wound. Very soon, I am going to kill people, just like I hunted this little animal down. Somehow, killing another person is wrong, while what I just did is right. 

     Memories of the people I murdered in the last war surged, draining me of all the excitement. My appetite was gone, as I sit  there with the deer wailing in pain, watching the steady flow of blood turn to a slow ooze, making a puddle around it. The stench of blood thickened the air, suffocating me with the memories of active battlefields. 

     Visions of such gore only led me to think about you, basking under the warm morning sun, singing in your sweet voice. The picture of you sitting on the green meadows, waiting with a smile and a basket of food, swimmed before my eyes. I long for those moments now every time I see food or when I am hungry. 

     I hope you are not worrying your health by keeping your thoughts on me too much that you refuse to take enough sustenance. Another cold night passes here, with remembered sound of your musical voice.
Yours,

Soldier in love. 

Image source: Pixabay 

Ooze

Forever loved (Weekly Photo Challenge)

We met when I was little 

I met a lot with many of your friends 

“ooh! Shiny!” I said

My little feet carrying me around 

Chasing you not to hurt

But to get closer

Years passed, concrete rose 

You disappeared, leaving me

In a colorless life, lonely. 

I waited and waited 

You just didn’t come

So here I am, moving into greens 

Finding you at last.

Welcome back, my friend!

Ooh, Shiny!

My Dear Darling (3)

Read the previous letters here.

My Dear Darling Series

Day 4
My Dear Darling,

     Today passed in endless travel. We are not in enemy territory yet. So it is easy to cover long distances in short time.  It is quite sad to see such beautiful places and then think about the destruction the war would bring. 

     One oasis we passed, I loved the most. Such greenery that makes you feel like venturing deep into the Amazon. The rare, wild flowers kept my gaze fixed on them during our respite. I watched a beautiful red flower devour a stout little bee, reminding me all too well of the purpose of my journey. Survival of fittest. Beautiful and delicate things can be deadly too. Even the savage survival of that blossom I wish to witness with you, hand in hand. As much as the relaxation such beautiful visions give me, they make me feel lonelier, even with us comrades bonding together. I even have one of my good friends from my earlier military service in my squadron here. Yet, it is your voice that I wish to hear. 

     Look at me. I am writing everything but what I really need to. Saying it would make it feel true. I don’t want it to. But I need to tell you even if it gives me much despair. I am quite sure you came to know this today. My dear, I am sorry. You will not be able to write me. My location will always be unpredictable. Even if you knew, receiving your correspondence without being intercepted by enemy hands will be too difficult, if I get it at all. 

     How do I go day after day without your words?! Dread and loss fill my heart. I can only tell you occasionally of my days but I can never know of yours. When I served in the previous war, I did not have anyone to write to. I did not feel this pain squeezing my heart tight as a python breaking it’s prey. But now I know what my comrades meant when they said they missed their wives. In a day, I have gone from waiting for your letter to imagining your voice. What war does to a man! I pray, to complete my mission successfully and return to base so I can hear from you one more time. 

Yours,

Soldier in love.

Image source: Pixabay

Remnants





Long day and a troubled sleep 

You wake up, mind disoriented 

Catch that train of thought 

From yesterday’s time

From there you pick

Things to take for today

Take a part of yesterday 

To make your wheel spin smooth

One day you see

You did that everyday 

Now you recognize 

You rise and walk for fresh air

Under a clear sky after a stormy night 

And see raindrops hanging from leaves

Remnants of yesterday. 

My Dear Darling (2)

Image Source: Pixabay 
Day 3

My Dear Darling,

    I am glad to hear you are well and that you’re staying with your mother. I will feel comfortable also if I know that you’re with familial company. Give your mother my greetings. 

   I am getting deployed tomorrow and I do not know when I can write you again. But tonight, I once again lay awake in my quarters thinking of you. The dark night outside feels baleful, filling me with dread for the days to come. I am supposed to be a man of valor. I ought to be your hero. But my love, I am scared. I promised you I will come back to you. I am going to do everything in a man’s power to keep that promise. But my heart asks the one horrendous question. It asks, “what if?”, for tomorrow, it all begins. 
   In the midst of the storm raging in my heart, you stand calm in its eye, smiling ever so peacefully.  You have become my strength, my line of life. Strange how a man goes to war to save his country but in truth fights hardest to get back to his heart that he left back home. I wonder if every soldier is like that. Such thoughts fill my mind already, before the first fight commences. 

    There is so much for me to share with you but now that I am writing this, words fail me. I am overcome by the feelings of missing you. I now try to sleep with our bed and your warmth in my mind’s eye, telling me I am home. 
Yours,

Soldier in love.